How the paranormal community has changed me
A few years ago I was in a very different place to what I am now. I didn’t even know most of you and I certainly didn’t think I would be here years later writing about all of these amazing things I have done. There can be a lot of negativity towards the paranormal community, but this is to show that it isn’t all bad, there are some really good things about our paranormal community. Here are 3 things that the paranormal community has given to me.
Oh the friendships. When I first ventured into the paranormal community many years ago, I was recovering from some pretty major surgery and coming out of a fog of depression. I had completely lost myself as a person. I had a few close friends who even though they are not a part of my paranormal journey (they take an interest and support me of course) they are a very important part of my life. I didn’t venture out of the house much and I spent my days at home with my boys who weren’t at kinder and school and I wasn't working at the time. I was a stay at home mum for around 6 years. I was bored out of my brain. I love my children dearly but I also felt like I was destined to be more than just a mum. I know other mum’s out there can totally relate to what I am saying. When I started going on tours and to paranormal events, I met people that became my best friends. I met people who have sparked a passion inside of me. I met people along the way and we all shared that common interest. We had a place that we could talk about something that people sort of felt was weird and that we can be embarrassed to talk about in the real world for fear of being labelled weird or laughed at. We would have fun at events, investigations and started referring to each other as family. We have inside jokes that only we understand and find absolutely hilarious. I even formed friendships with people in different states and countries that I know of within the field and share all of this with as well. I hear of so many beautiful friendships which have been formed through people meeting at paranormal events. I mean I even become friends with people that attend our tours. You cannot deny the power of friendship and this is probably the biggest thing that the paranormal community has given to me.
It surprises a lot of people when I tell people that I am shy. I suppose like a lot of people, I am very good at putting up walls an pretending to be confident and social. If I was in a room of people I would stand with someone I knew and wait for them to start a conversation with someone and just sort of insert myself into things because I was too scared to go up and talk to anyone. Working events and tours was a big part of changing this for me because you can’t be running a tour and not talk to anyone. I had to throw myself in head first. I was petrified but it was weird. Once things started and we were in there investigating, I forgot about all of my fears. I truely love investigating and that side of me took over. I forgot about everything else and suddenly my confidence started to grow. I went from being someone that was somewhat of a introvert to putting myself out there and being confident in social situations. Instead of hiding behind a friend in a room full of crowded people I can stand on my own and feel like I know the whole room. I even started doing public talks on paranormal topics. I used to do public speaking a lot when I was younger so I knew that I had this in me but it took the paranormal to bring that side out of me again. Why? Because it was something I am passionate about and I believe that anyone can talk confidently about something when you have the passion for it. I get so very nervouse before doing a talk and always regret signing up for it in the minutes leading up, but I go into autopilot. I know the information and I just start talking. I am in a room with people eager to hear what I have to say and I have my research I can present. Before I know it the nerves are gone and I just feel like Im talking with friends. By the time I'm finished, time has flown and I am ready to do it all again.
I didn’t really know how to come up with a title for this section but thinking was the only thing I could really ‘think’ of. You see the paranormal community makes me use my brain. When you are a mum, you crave mental stimulation. You love your kids but you don’t want to talk about minecraft all day. You can feel a bit braindead sometimes and as educated smart adults, our brain craves a bit more. There are so many different areas to the paranormal and so many different theories. Thanks to social media, we can have debates with other people in the community and exchange information. We can learn so many things from one another. You can learn from the person who has been in the industry for 30+ years who has a wealth of knowledge and you can learn from a newcomer who has a new fresh perspective on things. They can challenge you to back up your opinions and facts which make you a better investigator because you need to know your shit. Debate can get a lot of negative press because people can get really nasty and defensive but there are also some great debates that challenge you to think. Just researching alone stimulates the braincells. Having a conversation with a fellow investigator on a paranormal topic makes you think and use your brain. You sit and think about life and what is on the other side and how can it be. You sit and think about an experience you had and start looking at science and how that comes into play. Put simply, the paranormal makes you think and suddenly you don’t feel so braindead. You feel a but more useful. Any mum will tell you how amazing that feeling is to actually feel like you are contributing or of some use to the world that doesn’t not involve looking after your kids.
The field is not without it's drama and sometimes you may feel like 'Whats the point?'. When things get rocky, (they will it is just how things are), try to take a minute and think about the good things the community has done for you too. It may mean a lot more to you than you think!
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